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Beloved Leader: August 2008

Beloved Leader

On-the-spot whimsy and wisdom from a Benevolent Despot.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Way to SUCK, Hugo!

Pardon my talking the trash, but I can not let my good Socialist Comrade Hugo Chavez live this one down. His team brought a mere bronze medal home -- and this in Taekwondo, where two bronzes award. What is the matter, Hugo, all your athletes are playing baseball in America? And do not give me shit about our medal count. I cannot tell you how many southern puppet-state athletes are really plants from the North. Well, I could tell you then I would have you killed. So what is the point?

The point is I have more gold in my stool than adorns the necks of Venezuelans!

Mmmm... Goldschlager.

Overall, Good Haul

Yes, the medals are nice. But the important thing was getting the athletes back! Good work, fellows!

Monday, August 25, 2008

I have your special noodle, Comrade

If this sells well in western diet stores, screw the masses, that is valuable foreign currency!

Saturday, August 09, 2008

So Funny, Reuters

I forget to laugh.

This moron Basler is ripping off out of my blog archives and probably gets paid for it.

Does not this clown know nervous laughter when he sees? Some days when I am bored, I string together a monologue off-the-cuff with some random subjects like wicker baskets, years-end production quota, pig manure, and political cadre. The most coherent of these get written up as "On-the-Spot Guidance," while the others are attributed to "Beloved Leader's Humor."

See they all have pen and paper?

When the Guidance is as convoluted as if Dennis Miller were writing for The Family Guy, I tend to crack up myself, and let the boys in on the joke.

Dennis Miller and Family Guy are American popular culture icons I have a research team explain to me.

See You in Beijing!

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Chink Grabass

Monday, August 04, 2008

I Feel So Dirty Some Times

But I get over it.